Christmas Stockings and the Nats have a Bell ringer knocking on their door!

This was an annual column written by Laura so I am filling some big stockings here. There is so much unknown with the world today that the baseball world was almost frozen in time until Mike Rizzo got Josh Bell in a trade on Christmas Eve. Last year there was Cole in the Yankees stocking in the form of Gerrit Cole and as Steve wrote yesterday the Nats got Clay in their stockings (Sam Clay), but now they have a Bell ringing some Christmas tunes. 

So that leads us to, what the Nationals should find in their Christmas stockings?

Dave Martinez: a gift from the Lerners already came in the form of a contract extension and you only needs a big bat for his lineup to write in after Juan Soto.

Mike Rizzo: a whole lot of money in the budget from the Nats ownership to sign some impactful free agents

Bob Henley:  As Laura suggested before, you get a stop sign especially since you will be back to coaching 3rd base again!

Randy Knorr: He once imparted wisdom on a former Nats shortstop to take a $100+ million offer. That player thought the grass was greener on the other side and it was not. Can Knorr have that chat with Trea Turner? So in Knorr’s stocking is wisdom to share from his 35 years of professional baseball that included too many years on minor league buses. Also, extra copies of the book: Money Isn’t Everything

Jim Hickey: The ability to read minds and share some thoughts with his pitchers on self-preservation and how to win games more efficiently.

Kevin Long: Keys to a new condo in DC for a long stay.

Tim Bogar: PhotoShop software for photos and videos. We enjoyed your work after the World Series on that video you and your kids made. Baseball is supposed to be fun.

Max Scherzer: The fountain of youth!

Stephen Strasburg: Health and happiness!

Patrick Corbin: Another pitch for your repertoire and a new putter for your mini golf course.

Joe Ross: The Jim Hickey handbook on How To Throw A Great Changeup. Sure, get Dan Blewett’s book too.

Yan Gomes: Whatever he did on Sept 11 2020, just put that in a loop for a Groundhog Day for him.

Tres Barrera: A pardon from the drug suspension which modern science tells you should have been thrown out immediately on his appeal given the evidence.

Sam Clay: The same chance that Kyle Finnegan got!

Aaron Barrett: a Welcome Back sign with a Curly W on it.

Sean Doolittle: You might be gone, but we are sending you a photo album of your time in D.C.

Daniel Hudson: a spare glove that hopefully you can throw again in celebration

Tanner Rainey: A bullpen cart ornament for your Xmas tree

Will Harris: You deserve a vintage FOCO  Howie Kendrick bobblehead because you were a huge part of Nats history even though you were on the wrong side then, we will always love you for it.

Ryne Harper: A jersey with #34 on the back

Dakota Bacus: Another year to show you belong.

Erick Fedde and Austin Voth: Maalox because you’ll need it

Kyle Finnegan: you made it so enjoy a bottle of Dom Perignon

Wander Suero: a good toothbrush to keep that great smile bright.

Kyle McGowin: you read the Craig Stammen book on sliders. Now we give you the Hickey handbook.

Ryan Zimmerman: A Monopoly set where you can get that Get Out Of Jail Free card and hand that to Mr. Moneybags for a chance to play again. Also a yoga mat.

Starlin Castro: Wrist guards, wrist tape, and a tape on Bikram Yoga.

Victor Robles: One spot in the batter’s box where you stay for the full season.

Juan Soto: A national commercial because you earned it as probably the best player in baseball. I would love to see you in a Gatorade commercial.

Andrew Stevenson: that magic elixir you had in September!

Carter Kieboom: a third chance that is better than the first two.

Trea Turner: a long-term contract with the Nats and and when your son is born you will need this sweatshirt!

Yadiel Hernandez: A display case worthy enough to hold that walkoff home run ball!

Luis Garcia: a trophy shelf for all of your MLB “firsts”

Josh Harrison: A Swiss Army Knife as that is your calling.

Josh Bell: He got his change of scenery. No offense to the Bucs, but they just were a team surrounded by losing. Josh and Josh are reunited!

Jake Noll: As a newlywed we give you some plate settings from your bridal registry all engraved with Curly W’s.

 

 

This entry was posted in Feature. Bookmark the permalink.